Life is truly amazing sometimes. Just when you think you have everything figured out life throws you another curve ball, placing love in your sight, blocking your vision from anything else. Isn't it funny how that works out just when you believe you can go on no longer? I was coming to a point in my life where I was just ready to give up on everything. I didn't feel needed anymore let alone even wanted. Everyone who I believed to be my true friend only turned out to be a phony. To make matters worse my own family seemed to be turning their back on me. It began to feel as if I almost didn't exist. My days were so lonely and nights were restless. I wondered to myself how much longer I would be able to live my life like this. Nights alone I would lay alone on my mother's couch questioning myself if fighting was even worth it anymore. What's the purpose? Was I fighting for my own selfish needs? Then suddenly out of the blue I bumped into love, modestly I excused myself and apologized. But it was too late love had taken control; it's finally come to stay. I was so amused by the sweet words and stories we shared. With every word he was inching closer…..deeper into my heart, etching his name into my soul. I don't know what happened but love works like magic, and it's so true that my mind can't even begin to grasp it. He is my biggest blessing; a prayer I thought would never be answered. For so long I have been standing in the middle of the road not knowing where I was heading. But now he has come to guide me. Baby I know you're just as scared as I am but I need you to trust me with everything. I know we have both seen a lot of things in our life but I know that this time it's right. I won't hurt you! I'm just so glad that I finally got you in my life; it hasn't been the same without you…….
A Love Story….
HE’S CARRIED YOU THUS FAR…..
We all make mistakes at various points in our life and it's a test of faith. I don't know if you believe in GOD but he brings about all things for good. So he does have a plan for the good in all of this happening to you but in the meantime you must keep the focus and also keep the faith. GOD has brought you this far into life and what would make you think that he would just leave you now. Things always will continue to get worse before they get better. Just when you think you can't take anymore something else happens, but guess what, you get through it. Sometimes we continuously underestimate our own strength, you have two choices in life, to either let life beat you or beat it. Unless you choose to give up and stop fighting with GOD on your side, you are guaranteed to win! If things went good all the time we would take them for granted but since we have to all experience some level of hardships when we have good times we learn to appreciate them that much more.... GOD is always there for you only you can turn your back, but he never will and always will be there waiting for you to turn around and have faith....
Goodbye, Father I Never Had
Nine crayon coated pictures sticking to the refrigerator door, But if you never come back, Its okay, mom has picked up for your slack For so many years,
he says he knows you love him, but he says he loves you more.
Doodles of fathers and sons--under his fishing net.
He leaves the father's face blank, for a man he's never met.
He sits on the kitchen counter, waiting by the phone,
He brushes by the curtains, in case you decide to come home.
That boy, he's getting big now, he's got such a beautiful face.
His big brown eyes and joyful smile lighten up this empty place.
He tells all his friends at school that his father's working late,
and at the dinner table, he sets an extra plate.
He bows to say his prayer, and he prays he's not alone,
"Father, make me happy, Daddy please come home."
He's as sharp as a tack, and he's started to grow,
He's got your strong spirit, but I guess you wouldn't know.
He's written many letters, ones your eyes will never see,
begging you to visit him, be the Father you should be.
Your little boys a man now, your baby's all grown up.
He's made it through without you, when daddy didn't show up.
On his refrigerator, are sixteen letters to Dad.
Just in case the man comes back, the Father he never had.
Through all of my tears,
Your so called love never seemed to appear.
So I'm letting you go now,
I will let you drift without me,
I'll survive it somehow...
Though I have so many questions,
So many wounds with infections,
I suppose they'll go unanswered.
Good-bye to the man,
who has never once ever held my hand,
you decided to leave me alone
tossed me into a cold world unknown.
For so many years I felt guilt and denial thinking it was me,
But now I am grown and can finally see.
It makes me quite sad,
I feel so hurt and yet so mad,
But it has to be done, so...
Good-bye.
Dad.
